Hello, everybody

[Jargner]

Hello, I've noticed that most people are anti-social assholes here, so I brought a cookie.

http://infinitejestchallenge.files.wordpress.com/2008/01/chocolate_chip_cookie.jpg

Be amazed by the cookie!!!! Alright, now you can be asses.:D But seriously, hello everybody.

[Vesnic]

Hey fuckface.

Thanks for the cookie. I was actually hoping for one more because the seven I already consumed this evening just didn't cut it.

Why don't you write something or piss off. k?

thanxsobai! :eek:

[Jargner]

Cool, I was right!!! Hello, Vesnic. Thank you for the kind reply.:p

[Sven Smokevich]

Whatup, homeslice? Where da beer be at? Damn, what, not even a Natty to get down wit, and you be frontin pastries as big as tenements all up in my hood? Not cool bro, not down like we do in North Philly. Must be from Milwaukee or Long Island or some shit. Yeh, I'ma pass on dis, not my party at all. Peace.

[Jargner]

Err........... What? It looks like.... Hrm, let me try to answer you questions. Sup, da beer's at da store, I'm not from any of those places.

[donteatpoop]

Why hello Jargner and welcome to infinite-story. It is such a pleasure to make your acquantence. I look forward to seeing what you write. Maybe we can get together one day and collaborate on a story or something. We're real big on working together here. Can't wait to get to know you better. I'm sure we'll make great friends.

[Usoki]

A newbie who actually browses the forum before he makes his hide fair game? I'm impressed.

[ChubbyTeletubby]

Hi!

I'm really the only true anti-social wanna-be unabomber asshole here. The rest of 'these people' (as I like to call them) are educated, happy, productive citizens who live happy lives and have lots of friends and sexual intercourse with other living humans. This is why I hate them so very, very much.

A little about MYSELF (shhh, no one cares about you):

I live in a shack in the backwoods of Kentucky and cook crystal meth for a living. It pays for my alcohol and AIDS medication. I'm currently wanted in five states for various acts of criminal misconduct.

Apparently masturbating in front of children in Sunday School is considered 'inappropriate'. So is staging cripple fights. And feeling up coma patients. And kidnapping high school cheerleaders and keeping them in your basement for seven months. And sending suspicious powdered substances to congressmen.

What a world.

Anyway, welcome. Please be nice to these people. They are really on edge emotionally after the loss of Michael Ray Holt. I don't think anyone has really gotten over it.

And if you write something just make sure it's not stupid or boring. Apoth already has that covered.

Ta!

[End Master]

See Jargner, told you there wouldn’t be anything to worry about.

[Vesnic]

Not to rekindle old bad habits or anything, but this could really be the Chubby Manifesto.

Hi!

I'm really the only true anti-social wanna-be unabomber asshole here. The rest of 'these people' (as I like to call them) are educated, happy, productive citizens who live happy lives and have lots of friends and sexual intercourse with other living humans. This is why I hate them so very, very much.

A little about MYSELF (shhh, no one cares about you):

I live in a shack in the backwoods of Kentucky and cook crystal meth for a living. It pays for my alcohol and AIDS medication. I'm currently wanted in five states for various acts of criminal misconduct.

Apparently masturbating in front of children in Sunday School is considered 'inappropriate'. So is staging cripple fights. And feeling up coma patients. And kidnapping high school cheerleaders and keeping them in your basement for seven months. And sending suspicious powdered substances to congressmen.

What a world.

Anyway, welcome. Please be nice to these people. They are really on edge emotionally after the loss of Michael Ray Holt. I don't think anyone has really gotten over it.

And if you write something just make sure it's not stupid or boring. Apoth already has that covered.

Ta!

[End Master]

We should have poll to vote for the most "anti-social" person on here.

[Jargner]

See Jargner, told you there wouldn’t be anything to worry about.

I guess you were right, End. Though ChubbyTeletubby..... Is a Teletubby! It sickens me. His other acts don't really matter. The only thing that matters, is that he's a Teletubby, so he's as evil as Barney. Also, hello to donteatpoop, and Usoki. I have already started my own story. You should take a look at it. Too bad there are only a few rooms. But, I shall add to it over time. *Stops talking*

[End Master]

They probably won't find it easily since it isn't going to show up on the main story list yet.

Here's the link to Jargner's story.

http://www.infinite-story.com/story/3388/

So far it looks alright, but you forgot something very vital. Namely there's no link that goes back to the proper story from the background links you made. You'll have to fix that.

[Jargner]

Thanks End, I'm trying to fix that problem now. Though it might take a few minutes, I just made it very messy.

Edit:Ag, crap, just accidentally deleted a part of the story that I didn't save. *Tries to fix it*

Edit:Whew, fixed it, should work now.

[ChubbyTeletubby]

Interesting. Seems a little rushed, though. Just a little rushed. Nice premise. I like the whole 'Chicago in the '30s feel'

Kinda like the new batman movie. Organized crime. Gotta love it. And I do realize this is just your rough draft. Just flesh it out a little.

I'm not really one to talk, though.

Also, Sven, one of these days you and I are gonna have to smoke a fat one in North Philly. I'll bring the chronic, you bring the 40 oz.s and rolling papers.

If you're lucky I might even bring some shrooms. We'll ride unicorns through the hood. Trust me, it'll be fun. Just ignore the leprechauns. Or step on 'em. They squash pretty easy.

[Jargner]

Hrmm...... Rushed......... *Looks over his story* Could you tell me how it seems rushed? I'd like to improve it. Also, it takes place in 2008.

[ChubbyTeletubby]

I dunno, man. It's just rushed.

Let the other brilliant minds here give their ten cents. Mine don't mean shit.

It's just rushed. That simple. Didn't draw me in. Give us a little more physical description of the city. A little more background on the protagonist.

The dialogue isn't particularly interesting either. I did, however, enjoy this:

"What the fuck do you want?" He spouts.
"I work here, boss."
"You do?"
"Yeah."
"Alright, clean the shit."

Just nitpicking. Being honest. Do your own thing. Fuck what I say.

[Jargner]

Yeah, I guess you're right, I'll describe more about the city, but I prefer to let the protagonist be the reader. Y'know, a few details, but not much more than that. I'll be sure to ignore you after this, though.:p

[Vesnic]

I agree with the Teletubby. In these harried modern times, I tend to be a stickler for little details like "plot", "character development" and "story".

[Jargner]

Alright, I updated the introduction and the history page about the protagonist, tell me what you think.

[ChubbyTeletubby]

Well...

Slow down there, pilgrim. Again, don't rush it. How about you give us a week? Do your own thing.

In the end all that matters is that YOU had a good time writing this world into existence.

I CAN tell you this, however. You need to make the world seem real, if you want to draw the reader in.

Little moments matter, sprinkled throughout. Little moments.

And again, nothing I say matters. Just unbiased opinion here. Again, welcome aboard.

Stay awhile.

[Jargner]

Hrrm..... Yeah, though it's hard to stay here with the teletubby staring at me. I guess I should only add new rooms every couple days, no need to rush it........

[Usoki]

What we mean by 'rushed' is that ten/fifteen minutes of movie action is happening in a matter of sentences. And at the bottom of each room is a life-changing choice. It seems like every decision in the protagonist's life is super important, and internal. I'm half expecting to choose to eat eggs for breakfast only to end up as a double agent helping the police fight the mobs. If you were to expand it, you would want to put more details to the fight scenes, and maybe even split rooms from those details. Do you hide behind the counter, or try and disarm him? Stuff like that.

But, personally, you seem like a cheery, happy guy trying to write a dark, gloomy story. It's not working well. The mood of the piece is so light hearted I can't take the story seriously. Between the short descriptions and the simple word choice...it feels like a happy piece. Which makes the profanity and the content seem really out of place.

Also, you're spineless. You've bent over backwards to appease every suggestion that's come your way as if they were law. Care to stand up for your decisions?

[End Master]

I'm half expecting to choose to eat eggs for breakfast only to end up as a double agent helping the police fight the mobs.

Lol.

The other branch could be if you choose cereal for breakfast you get recruited by the Yakuza instead.

[Vesnic]

And here we thought you might have had potential. It would seem you're finished already, Jargner. There's nothing for you to do now but throw yourself into a tar pit.

[Jargner]

Alright then, to be kind, fuck you guys. Fucking assholes. Bend over backwards. Shove a dildo up your ass. Motherfucker. Usoki, I've read your suggestion and have decided to implement it, also, I'm not bending over backwards for anyone, I'm taking suggestions, considering them, and implementing them if they make fucking sense. I'm not bending over backwards. Now shut the fuck up.

[Vesnic]

Hmmm, well you do use the apostrophe correctly most of the time, so you're back in my good graces.

[Jargner]

Bah, I'm deleting the story, and making another one. I've read it, and it fucking sucks. It seems too fake, plastic. No emotion, like a fucking robot. Also, End, I've decided to resume the Pyromancer idea, in a different setting. Thank you kindly for making me see that I can't write stories with these themes. I can't make a dark, gritty story without making it seem fake. So thanks for that, really. No, this does not make me spineless. I now know how much the story seems fake. Most dangerous city in the world, bah.

[Usoki]

Alright then, to be kind, fuck you guys.

Much better! Welcome to the site. You listen, you accept feedback, but you're not a spineless lemming. You're fully capable of standing up for yourself when the time comes. And the liberal usage of profanity doesn't hurt either. XD You, I can see sticking around.

[End Master]

Also, End, I've decided to resume the Pyromancer idea, in a different setting.

Actually I thought that’s what you were going to do in the first place. I said in the PM to go ahead with your Pyromancer idea, but just to create your own setting for it since you’ll feel like you accomplished more that way.

Just remember to avoid the pitfalls of the guy I told you about who was "inspired" by Legend.

[donteatpoop]

Also, it takes place in 2008.

Wow! That far in the future? I don't know, SciFi is pretty much hit or miss with me.

[Vesnic]

We all like to have our asses licked from time to time, but I would suggest that you have your story take place in its own universe, not in one already created by one of us.

[Hi! My name is: Katie]

Alright then, to be kind, fuck you guys. Fucking assholes. Bend over backwards. Shove a dildo up your ass. Motherfucker. Usoki, I've read your suggestion and have decided to implement it, also, I'm not bending over backwards for anyone, I'm taking suggestions, considering them, and implementing them if they make fucking sense. I'm not bending over backwards. Now shut the fuck up.


I like him. He has spunk.

[Jargner]

So, you have to be an asshole to stick around? I can get used to that.

[Usoki]

I dunno that you have to be. But it certainly helps.

[Jargner]

Well, just started my story, need to add to it and improve it before I release it to the public, though.

[ChubbyTeletubby]

But of course.

Take your time. You've garnered yourself a lot of attention. I think when you actually DO release it you'll have a lot of interested people checking it out.

That's a good thing. Just take your time.

Why am I even giving advice? Mageslayer was a failure and CRACK ATTACK is funny but horrible.

[MikaelL]

It's a bit offtopic, yes, but why doesn't my name show on the active members list? Also, why can't I change my avatar on the mainsite.

I would have liked to have read your story, Jargner. Why don't you let people read your work in progress? It doesn't matter what people think about it. Also, criticism is always positive. Even if it isn't constructive. Just write more and more every time someone says you can't do it. Grow bitter and self-absorbed like a REAL writer.

[End Master]

I assume you're talking about the main writing site, because you're showing up on the members list on the forums.

As for the main site, it's been in a state of bugginess and re-design for about a year or so. The active members list never updates at all. Neither does the "The Newest Story" list. Even the random story list only displays a selected set of randomized stories, it doesn't change the set.

The avatars on the main site don't work either anymore. If you already had a pic up before, it continues to display, but attempting to change it or put up a new one now won't work.

I imagine this stuff will get sorted out with the new site, but who knows when that will happen.

[MikaelL]

That's weird. The newest stories list seems to work for me. My story is presented there right now.

[End Master]

On the home page?

Because the drop down lists work fine. (Your story is at the top for creation date right now) Its just on the home page that the 5 newest stories list doesn't update.

Well at least it hasn't updated for me and a few others since last year.

[Jargner]

It's a bit offtopic, yes, but why doesn't my name show on the active members list? Also, why can't I change my avatar on the mainsite.

I would have liked to have read your story, Jargner. Why don't you let people read your work in progress? It doesn't matter what people think about it. Also, criticism is always positive. Even if it isn't constructive. Just write more and more every time someone says you can't do it. Grow bitter and self-absorbed like a REAL writer.
Well, I like taking my time, plus I like to improve my stories before I show them in the light. It's like being a surgeon, you work and work and if you don't like it, you work and work some more, never stopping, just cutting, hearing them bitch and whine, never stopping, NEVER FUCKING STOPPING!!!! HEARING THEM BITCH!!!!! CUTTING THEIR FUCKING THROATS!!!!!! STABBING THEM UNTIL THEY STOP FUCKING MOVING!!!!!!!!! Then, you throw it in the garbage and start over. That's what I usually do if I don't like it.

Edit: I'll probably release it soon.

[End Master]

It's like being a surgeon, you work and work and if you don't like it, you work and work some more, never stopping, just cutting, hearing them bitch and whine, never stopping, NEVER FUCKING STOPPING!!!! HEARING THEM BITCH!!!!! CUTTING THEIR FUCKING THROATS!!!!!! STABBING THEM UNTIL THEY STOP FUCKING MOVING!!!!!!!!!

You've been reading Love SICK again.

[Jargner]

What? It's a good story. Anyways, I probably won't be releasing Pyromancer anytime soon.

[Jargner]

UPDATE: My story unfortunately only has one page, due to my modem deciding to break down on me, and it taking a while for me to get a new one. :( I'm gonna get back to working on it, but don't expect it to be released for a while.

Edit: I'm going to change the story, instead of involving Pyromancy, I'm gonna change it. I've been playing Fallout 3 for a few days, and it's given me an idea.

[Usoki]

Oh, good- a status update. We can breathe easily now.

Because, y'know, we totally didn't forget you existed or anything.

[Vesnic]

Hahahaha! I love you, Usoki, you and all of your curmudgeonly ill humor. I feel precisely the same way about this Junior Dickcheese who has decided to rejoin our ranks. All I got to say is:

Words speak louder than words.

That means, and I'm talking to you now, Jarlsberg, that your story words count for far more than your forum ones. We're a bunch of assholes slinging cybershit at each other ape-style, but at least most of us have some real shit over at the site.

You know what I'm saying here?

And really, you had to get Fallout 3 to find inspiration? How about the French New Wave or the Japanese Janji Ganja or, best of all, your mother's hole. I find most of my shit there (a medical oddity that has yet to be explained).

[Jargner]

Wow, an insult about my mother. That really hurts me on the inside, so much that I want to cut myself, and bleed, letting the pain flow from my veins. I should also write poetry about how much I hate my life, because I need a compliment from you, without one I am incomplete.

[donteatpoop]

Wow, an insult about my mother. That really hurts me on the inside, so much that I want to cut myself, and bleed, letting the pain flow from my veins. I should also write poetry about how much I hate my life, because I need a compliment from you, without one I am incomplete.

The first step is admitting it, Jergner. Tell your mom I said hi. She'll know who I am.

[Jargner]

The first step is admitting it, Jergner. Tell your mom I said hi. She'll know who I am.

So, I tell her that a guy named donteatpoop told me to say hi? Okay.

[Locke]

I've got to say, Jargs, you may not be the most prolific fellow, but at least you roll with the punches, whether they're in good fun or otherwise. That said, I'd honestly forgotten about you, and I don't expect much from you as regards your story. Good luck, anyhow; surprise me, why don't you?

[thoric]

Ignore Ves. She's just bitter because nobody loves her.

[Vesnic]

That said, I'd honestly forgotten about you, and I don't expect much from you as regards your story.

We should give Locke the Award for Best Underhanded Incomplimensults. No one says "you suck" quite as sinuously as he does.

(Look it up, morons.)

As for not being loved by anyone, this is a serious condition indeed in the otherwise comical experience of being human. It's no laughing matter, you squirty little pipsqueak.

[End Master]

Fallout 3 eh?

Let's hope you have a better ending than Bethesda did, because they fucking dropped the ball on that aspect of it.

Still a cool game though.

[Locke]

That said, I'd honestly forgotten about you, and I don't expect much from you as regards your story.

That line from my last post wasn't an insult, by the way, underhanded or otherwise; sorry if anyone mistook it for such. What I said is my honest opinion; it may come across as harsh, but I don't see any reason to mislead you. I won't resort to insults and vulgarity (nothing against those of you who do occasionally; you're all obviously fine with it) but when I have thoughts on a forum issue, for better or worse, you'll know them.

[Jargner]

That line from my last post wasn't an insult, by the way, underhanded or otherwise; sorry if anyone mistook it for such. What I said is my honest opinion; it may come across as harsh, but I don't see any reason to mislead you. I won't resort to insults and vulgarity (nothing against those of you who do occasionally; you're all obviously fine with it) but when I have thoughts on a forum issue, for better or worse, you'll know them.

I can understand why you don't expect much from my story. If I was another person, I wouldn't have much faith in me making a good story, either. Maybe I will surprise you, maybe I won't.

[Vesnic]

I won't resort to insults and vulgarity (nothing against those of you who do occasionally; you're all obviously fine with it)

Right. My point exactly.

[Hi! My name is: Katie]

Hey man,

Good luck! I'm taking this statistics class, and if we consider that there are two possible outcomes for your success, odds are pretty good that you will make the best stinking story on the site. I mean, after all, you either do or you don't, so it is fifty fifty!

Seriously though, I'm sure you have lots of great ideas, I know I do all the time. The secret to great writing though is to be dedicated. Instinctively I suspect that might be why you haven't tossed something out onto the net yet, and truthfully that makes you a few steps ahead of the crappy one sentence per room and leet speak writers we have pass through on occasion.

~Katie

[End Master]

Usoki, Locke and Chubby just need to have a four way with Ves and get it over with.

Nobody would even have to wait a turn since there's enough holes to accommodate everyone.

I'm guessing Usoki would be the "lucky one" to get Ves' pussy since she'd probably wouldn't mind looking him in the face. Though I'd imagine she'd be too busy with a close up of Locke's dick to actually look at Usoki.

Locke would only get his dick sucked since she's too disgusted and antagonistic towards him to actually fuck him. Though in her twisted mind she'd enjoy degrading herself by sucking him off. Locke would feel a similar way about Ves, however since he's repressed he'd probably agree to this demented orgy as long as nobody found out about it, plus he'd rationalize it in his mind that he's not actually doing anything wrong since he's just getting his dick sucked and not actually "having sex".

And Chubby would feel shame by the whole thing, however if it means getting laid, and if he's drunk enough (Which is most of the time) he'd go along with it. However he'd still feel deep shame so he'd get Ves' ass since if he's going to feel dirty he might as well go all the way with it so he can truly feel like a degenerate and shouting the whole time "DON'T LOOK AT MY FACE! DON'T FUCKING LOOK AT MY FACE! BITCH! WHORE! BITCH! WHORE! MOMMY!"

Then to top it all off Apoth could come in and jerk his massive 20 inch cock on all of them, while "Mr. Big Stuff" plays in the background.


There. Vulgar enough for all of you?

[Vesnic]

Hahahaha! Brilliant! Simply brilliant.

Thank you, End. "Thou has comforted me marvelous much".

Also, if anyone else wants in on the action, you could probably share a hole or two. Just bring extra Astroglide, kthanxbai! :p

[ChubbyTeletubby]

You are a mean, nasty man, End!

I salute you.

[Locke]

There's little point in outlining the difference between morals/ethics/standards and "repression." I do see the humor, though, End.

[End Master]

To be honest the post was just going to be a simple statement about Locke and Ves needing to just have sex with each other and getting it over with since they've been sniping each other in several threads, but I ended up going overboard again and it amused me to add Chubby and Usoki in the mix. (and Apoth as an after thought)

[Vesnic]

My God, Locke, are you ever going to get off of your high horse? Do you have any idea what an insufferable prig you can be? Who made you a knight of morals and ethics? You condescend to speak with us degenerates, missing no opportunity to remind us that you do so because, despite our many and obvious flaws, you can't help but see some opaque potential in us. Has it not occurred to you that there is a mammoth insult inherent in such statements? Yet you scream bloody murder when certain among us, to whom you seem to have taken a particular disliking, resort to crass humor or other such feather-ruffling trivialities. Do you think it is any more "ethical" of you to say that you barely know how to express enough contempt for me than it is for me to slide a sideways joke into a thread? If you look at the content of those two behaviors, yours is really the much more bitingly personal, judgmental and indecent. Are you really so sure of your absolute rightness in all things that you can make these vicious remarks without second thought? This is a writing forum. We are not a religious or moral community and we have not all agreed to any one standard of anything. We did not ask for you to come here and dispense misguided and unwelcome judgment on any of our activities. In fact, I have often found your stultifying comments to be a real inhibitor to the collective creative process. You devised your own, radically different persona in the form of Sven, yet you paradoxically invest so much self-righteous energy into the varied personae of others on this forum. I can draw only two possible conclusions from this: first, that your "Locke" persona is also a sort of joke that you take no more seriously than you did Sven or, secondly, that you have no problem creating a double standard in favor of whatever inclinations you may be feeling at any given moment. If you are actually so offended by us, then why do you stick around? If you choose to be a part of this community, then it is going to get real old real fast when you can't stop yourself from reprimanding several established users for behavior over which you have absolutely no jurisdiction. On this site, there is no law of decency, morality, manners, ethics, religion, or any of those concepts that you cling to as so absolute. We say what we want, how we want, and when we want. Of course, this means that you are free to continue spewing your nonsense for the present and future chagrin of all. However, it is likely to make you a very unpopular guy and also create considerable tensions within the forum; and if you are truly as nice as you claim to be, then you would certainly not want to be the cause of such an unfortunate mess, would you? Let me tell you that I'm not going anywhere, and I'm not changing my persona or myself for you or anyone else here. You can say what you like, but it will have all the great gravitas of Wonderbubbles in a summer breeze.

[Locke]

Thank you for being forthright and blunt. I like that, you know?

I think the Sven persona needs some clarification, first. Since it never materialized, you probably don't recall the IS-format story I proposed to write with others over the summer. That was sort of a "last straw" incident for me. As far as character flaws go, it served to highlight a major one that's plagued me for a long time: I have good intentions, but when it comes time to follow through - due in large part to a sort of apathy - I often procrastinate and then drop the matter altogether. Despite my ideals, I care what others think of me, and it became so embarrassing to continue posting as a writer of some skill and grand claims who did not write - who did not deserve your respect - that I felt it necessary to stop posting altogether.

I still lurked, though, and I found that I genuinely missed the community and my own involvement. I created the Sven persona - a character with beliefs near the opposite of my own - so I could participate without being recognized, and as something of an amusement, particularly regarding the dialect and ethnic confusion. I've come far enough in dealing with that particular flaw - and time has likely made distant enough any ill will it generated - that I felt I could reappear as myself.

Regarding the recent political thread, I openly posted thoughts that have come to be a part of my identity. When you posted what you did - such an apparently vulgar, combative, and unprovoked statement - I perceived it as a direct personal attack on that identity, and I let you know what I thought about it. It seemed extremely petty and mean-spirited to me; I could not fathom your posting it as some sort of well-intentioned humorous aside. The thought process behind that is still alien to me. I tender my apologies here for the severity of my response, but those were my honest thoughts at the time: I have always hated those who, unprovoked, mock and push buttons, and as I couldn't discern any other motive, I believed that to be your intent.

You seem to find me particularly unpleasant since my return to the forums. That's probably, in part, because I am more completely honest than I was in the past; this is particularly true on the forum where I don't have to worry about the potentially harsh aspects of that unfiltered honesty hurting those I care about. Despite that, however, I try not to be judgmental or patronizing. The phrase I posted earlier in this thread ("nothing against those of you who do occasionally; you're all obviously fine with it"), like others of similar intent and structure, was actually meant to say, "I disagree with you, but I respect our difference of opinion, and I'm not trying to be condescending or to pass judgment."

I actually think that forcefully imposing one's beliefs on others is usually wrong; accordingly, I don't. It is, I guess, a thin line to walk between honesty and perceived condescension sometimes. I can see, when I examine my previous posts for alternate interpretations, how one might in some cases mistake one for the other. I will in all fairness subject future posts to further scrutiny to eliminate such misunderstandings. When you read something I post, though, it will be the truth as I see it.

Your values and mine are very different, I think, and I doubt we will ever see eye to eye. It's my belief that simple misunderstandings on both sides stemming from those differing values and thought processes escalated things to this point. I don't think there's really a need for us to attack one another further; this is my overture to you. Shall we "agree to disagree" with less vitriol in the future, and let bygones be bygones?

[End Master]

Mmm, see this is the kind of thing that's probably going to piss off Ves more.

She'd probably rather you scream and rant at her rather than going to excessive lengths to explain yourself in a calm manner since she believes it to be incredibly condescending. (It might be how you word things, I'm not exactly sure)

Personally as long as you aren't claiming to be the master of 74 different languages, 89 different instruments, have a 395 IQ, spamming lame jokes and stupid comments while jerking it to Russian pre-op trannys dressed as Shakespeare on Shitspace you're fine in my book.

Isn't it interesting the types of "personalities" that we find that we just cannot tolerate?

Like for example, drums is always a nice target for everyone to kick around, but Usoki has particularly found him loathsome and makes a greater effort to curb stomp him when he shows up.

[Usoki]

I couldn't even tell you what, exactly, it is that I hate about drums. I guess it's his social skills. "Hi guys! I'm too stupid to figure out that I'm universally hated! Please help me with my story! I've set up a background for it- now I just need some one to write all of it for me. It'll be great. Hey! No cussing! It's not civil! Now excuse me, I have a question regarding ethics of aliens with young bodies but old souls and robots made to look young."

...the bastard. I wonder if I was abused by a snare drum when I was a child.

[Vesnic]

Thank you for your post, Locke. It helps to know a bit more about where you are coming from when you make some of these statements that I have found irritating or hurtful. When I added to the politics thread, it wasn't meant to be a personal attack against anyone here. I was merely frustrated with hearing the same tired political arguments over and over again, and in a larger sense, I have very little tolerance for any debate of this sort since I am increasingly convinced that popular opinion has little to no sway in the current political system.

I would continue to caution you not to be so hasty to judge me or my motives.

Again, though, I appreciate this overture you have made, and despite what some people believe, I am not always a fan of flame wars and anarchy. In other words, I accept. Hopefully we can grow to truly appreciate one another for our differing opinions.

[Usoki]

Well, I think there's one conclusion we can make from all of this.

Someone has stolen Ves's password.

[donteatpoop]

Congrats Jargner, you've spawned a trade of insults that has spanned several pages. This might be the most activity the forums have had in ages.

[Locke]

Maybe he's not as benign and naive as we thought? Chubby, you might have some competition...

[Vesnic]

Finding a scapegoat and then burning him is a great way for a society to purge and purify itself. So...

Find the Jargner! Tie up his arms and his legs with twine! Drag him down to the town square! Gather up all ye' kindling! And ye' A1 Sauce!

It's barbeque tonight!

[thoric]

Ves, you sound like the medieval church. :P

[Usoki]

'Twas Apoth, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome Xnull outgrabe.

"Beware the Jargner, my friend!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Locke bird, and shun
The frumious Donteatpoop!"

He took his Vesnic sword in hand:
Long time the EndMaster foe he sought --
So rested he by the Thoric tree,
And stood awhile in thought

And as in Usoki thought he stood,
The Jargner, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the Dragavan wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! and through and through
The Vesnic blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

"And hast thou slain the Jargner?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!"
He chortled in his joy.

'Twas Apoth, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome Xnull outgrabe.

[Jargner]

He he he, looks like someone wants to burn me at the stake. That makes me feel important. Ooooh, a poem? With me in it? Thank you, Usoki. "Jabberwocky" was pretty nonsensical, but that's what gives it its charm in my opinion. Thank you, End, for that vulgar, but charming post. Really, thank you all, you're the best bunch of people I've ever met!

[Usoki]

Jabberwocky is pretty hardcore awesome. I enjoy it. Especially 'vorpal', 'tulgey', and 'snicker-snack'.

Like you pointed out at the thread's start- we're assholes. You're on the right track for member acceptance. Just start posting in other threads more, and you're pretty much there.

[ChubbyTeletubby]

Locke:

You came across as a 'square' during that last round of political discourse.

Not because of your personal beliefs, but because of your nerdy-ass stupid response to Ves's lighthearted jabbing.

That simple. Where do you think you are?

Maybe you have some childhood issues concerning rain and soggy wee wees.

If you really take yourself so seriously please do me a personal favor and drive your car or truck or fucking horse and buggy off a very high cliff, with several Congressmen bound and gagged in your trunk, for good measure. Mmk, sport? Thaaaaaaaaaaaanks.

And then maybe die. If not, make sure at least the elected officials do. Take along a utility knife just in case. Thaaaaaaaaaaaanks.

Appreciate it, Champ

Yours truly,

Chubby T

P.S. I'm not a fag. Promise.

[Dragavan]

P.S. I'm not a fag. Promise.

You just keep telling us all that Chubs...

[Locke]

You know, Chubby, it's a little late for a comeback to that one. That was eleven days ago, and in a completely different thread. I mean, you did call me both a nerd and a square; that undoubtedly represents a solid effort on your part, so props for that, but let's face it, you just thought about it for too long. Classy and hardcore as those insults look to you, you took so much time just coming up with them that they lost all their sting.

Granted, as this is the product of a full week and a half of thought and effort, I'm flattered you kept yours truly in mind that long - and also a little disturbed - but when I think about how bad the original comeback must have been, unaided by all those days and nights of contemplation, I understand. It's a lose/lose situation for you, but even though you know you'll wind up looking foolish, you keep trying your level best with this stuff. I can respect that. It's kind of sad in one way, but if this is how you want to spend your time, I guess it would be cruel of me to disrespect your hard work by replying with an insult of my own. Keep it up, man; don't get discouraged. Even the slowest among us can achieve things in life. I'll do a better job of pretending to be wounded next time; if you start dreaming up that comeback now, you might just pull it off.

[ChubbyTeletubby]

Thank you, Locke.

I needed that.

Like a flower needs a turtle in May.

[Vesnic]

I just scored for cough syrup, bitches!

That's right, the GOOD kind.

I am so cute and respectable looking.

Looking.

No one seems to realize what a DEPRAVED JUNKIE I REALLY AM.

Yippeee!

[Locke]

My cousin likes to trip on that stuff (actually Coricidin, to be accurate). He says it's cheaper than weed, and he's unemployed so that's what he does. Sometimes I pity that guy; more often he gets on my nerves (only minimally is this ever because he's off tripping when he calls me).

[PabNubAddinna]

Im Derek Nice to meet you and welcome to the forums

Yes, it was in 1999.. At least in America.. Im not sure about Japan.

Anyway, i hope you have tonsa fun here -

[Cat2000]

I was reading through this, and now I have a headache.

Anyway... welcome to new people. I've been around for a while, but seem to be dipping in and out. I now have a pretty major story to work on, though, so it looks like I'll be around for a while.

I will also make an effort to read and give feedback on more stories on here. Promise. Also... did I miss something? Why is Ves only saying, 'Blah blah blah'?

[End Master]

Once again, the short version: She got pissed at everyone and committed internet suicide by replacing all her posts with "blah blah blah".

[Cat2000]

... Huh. Why was she so annoyed? I feel like I missed a lot.

[End Master]

There were a few debates about the contest, she didn't like people disagreeing with her, she accused others of "undermining" her and had a drama queen break down.

You didn't miss too much, though it was sort of amusing at the time since she made a big deal out of nothing.

[Cat2000]

Ah. Well, it sounds like she's the one missing out. I like the contest idea, but I don't think it's one I'm going to be able to do right now. Oh, well. I look forward to reading others' entries, though ^^

[Ryan_DuBois]

If you don't enter, there may not be any.

:D

As for the new people, I think only that uranam0 person is legit. I've got to admit, though, aside from the one who keeps posting weird characters in the off-topic section, some of these bots are getting pretty clever. Human-like. Maybe before long, they'll be writing our stories for us!

[Cat2000]

You know, that should be a really scary thought... but with how frustrating my writing is right now, I'd really love a bot to do it for me.

Of course, then it might turn into something like, 'I, Robot'... only online.

And really? There might not be a contest? Aww... but it's such a neat idea. If I could work out how to adapt one of my existing stories into a never-ending story, I'd definitely enter.

Theoretically, I suppose, I could just make the minimum number of rooms and loop them all through - but then I'd just want to go into big, major storylines, and... well, it would just get really complicated.

[End Master]

I'd say concentrate on your own story and don't try to change it around for the contest since this one is pretty much cancelled.

Xnull disappeared.

Ves took her ball and went home.

Katie partially wrote a story and posted it, but she didn't finish it since the theme was a little boring to her.

Ryan said he posted an unfinished story too, but he basically isn't feeling the theme either.

I've probably written enough rooms to qualify if I did some hasty half-assed looping, but its far from properly finished (and won't be in time) and while I don't think it's bad, it's not my best work and I can't bring myself to post a story that I don't feel is up to standard. (Especially if it isn't finished)

Apoth might post something I suppose, but it'll probably be another Mudkip single link type thing and he'll just loop it.

I think the only person who might turn in a complete looping story of quality is Usoki since he was the most enthusiastic about the topic and suggested it. Plus he said we had permission to beat him if he didn't.

[Ryan_DuBois]

I might have been being a little over-pessimistic, Cat -- I'm sure that the contest will still go on (in some shape or form), it just seems likely to be the worst one yet. And, since the past contents have been very good in my opinion, that's not necessarily a bad thing. We've got to hit rock-bottom before we can pick ourselves back up, I guess.

And next year, the theme will probably be something way cooler.

Like sand.

Or Superman.

Something like that.

Anyway, I've probably already said I'm thinking about touching up this war story I've got a couple rooms on and entering that. The story I have posted seems okay, I just got out of control with the scope of it. It's almost starting to look like an interactive novel where you can only change certain scenes slightly; there are a few choices, but it still progresses linearly.

Plus I think a nice, demented, chaotic war story would be easier to use some crazy loops.

[Cat2000]

Ah... Well, maybe next contest? I'll try and read some of the stories in the next few weeks or so.

[Usoki]

If a majority of the forum members "aren't feeling it", I don't see much point in keeping the contest the way it is. Why don't we take the contest, and put everything on hold for a while. If we want to have an infinite contest later on, in its own right, we can do that later (I did indeed finally come up with a really good idea for it).

To me, the point of the contest is for everyone to submit something interesting, and then to give and receive awesome feedback about it. So if everyone is just going to post mediocracy...why bother?

Since I sort of adopted the contest from Ves after she left... is anyone opposed to me tweaking it a bit? I propose that... aww, heck, I'll put it in another thread for better visibility.

[The_Writer]

I posted in the wrong thread somehow. Probably an error between my keyboard and my chair.